Sometimes our imagined progress is greater than our actual progress, We think ourselves enlightened, then we find ourselves in an ego trap. We think we have been working hard, then we stop to take inventory of our work and find much of it has been spinning our wheels. I think sometimes that I have further deconstructed past ways of thinking and being yet all of a sudden find myself sitting with those same thought patterns and feelings. Am I really moving forward? Are we really making progress? Am I kidding myself? In these moments I'm reminded of the song quoted above, reminded that it's good to:
Not hitting my goals can incite feelings of frustration. The sense of losing progress doesn't feel good. We like to move forward. We like to move. Stopping and sensing can create space for clarity. I can acknowledge where I am, what I'm doing, and get up again. Maybe all it takes is reorienting. Maybe the stop was all I needed. I know I can get up and run again and adjust as necessary. I know it's not just me, either. I mean, we all struggle with forward motion.